These Mess Ages

I was looking forward to this weekend for a variety of reasons, relief being, palpably, the greatest. And then I woke up yesterday morning to find we’re at it again. I say we because what you allow to happen is your individual responsibility. A few weeks back, I was sat, warming myself against the Aga. I live in an old house and it’s bloody cold and, due to a few years of no money, abutted to a good few years of too much money married with utter profligacy, I have been judiciously adjusting the thermostat whenever I find the thermostat fairies have been playing with it in the opposite direction. Anyway, as I sat there, I penned a note that read; it isn’t that there is a bullet out there with my name on it, my name is on every bullet.

Yesterday, I bombed a school and killed over a hundred children.

In terms of my litany of crimes this is relatively innocuous. Of course I will retaliate against myself for this heinous act, I’m in an escalatory mood and there is, literally, no limit to the devastation I will bring.

Stormzy proclaimed Heavy Is the Head That Wears the Crown. In this respect he was thoroughly wrong. The Crown is Peace. It is why the act of regicide is high treason and also explains why the succession of the crown is a matter settled by offspring. This being the most expeditious manner in which to bring about a settled kingdom under which we may all fight amongst ourselves to our hearts content. So, in truth, whomsoever wears the crown is our spiritual leader. Which then rather lends itself to explaining rather a lot.

Talking of spiritual leaders, I see that I managed to off one yesterday, I’m never so pre-occupied with killing children that I can’t spare a hand in the killing of old men. Murder is vertiginous, and I am the very heart of the kaleidoscope that sits atop all life.

Talking of life. It has been said of places that they have a right to exist. This is patent nonsense. A person is the only thing that has a right to exist, and that right is evidenced in so much as no person has a right to murder. Of course, if we allow for the decrepit thinking that a place, a state for instance, has a right to exist, then we are, sure as shit, on the path to that other place, where we do indeed have a right to murder. Only it is that place that has such confected rights, as no person can.

And so here I am, resplendent in my crowning glory, wishing for all the world that it were some unplaced else. Spiritual leader indeed.